Let Me Go Home...

Currently Listening:


(because it's just too appropriate--the ultimate "I'm-depressed-in-Europe" song)

I think I'm ready to go home now, guys. I must sound schizophrenic, wanting to move to Italy one day and wanting to leave the next. But I'm just inexplicably depressed today. I want to go home to the people I love and the things that are familiar. It's really not so much that I'm tired of Italy; Italy is still wonderful, I just need to go home.

The heat doesn't help things. Agosto has come in all his fury; even the native Romans know better than to stay in the city during August. They close their businesses and leave the city in droves, heading to the beach or the mountains for almost the whole month, usually. I can see why. It's so hot today...I am pretty sure I'll never be able to fully explain the utter misery of being outside today, but trust me when I say it's the worst it's been this whole trip. Even my professor, who until today had us convinced she was made of iron, was struggling and ended up calling class early because the heat and humidity were unbearable. And yet, we still had to bear it...On my way back to school, I wondered if I would ever get there. I don't know what it feels like to pass out from heat, but I'm pretty sure I was close to doing it today. Rachel was asking me if I was going to make it!

So yeah, I overheated pretty badly, and I still don't feel well. That probably is why I'm down. I want to go back to the apartment and sleep, but going home takes at least 45 minutes, either baking at the bus stop and in the bus-turned-sauna, or walking home. And I know that once I get there, I'll just be sweating anyway, since of course there's no air conditioning. The fan helps, but it's not enough today. So I can't handle going out in the heat now. I feel kind of stuck here, bored, nauseated, head aching, and depressed.

I normally don't allow myself to post thoroughly depressing things like this, I suppose because I don't want to bring people down, but that's really all I've got today. Sorry.

This computer lab is kinda hot, so I'm going to take refuge in the (slightly) cooler library. Lots of love to you guys...