Happy New Year!

Well, it's just a tad early, but I probably won't be back to my computer before the big day. I'm going to a friend's house, and she's not really a computer type.

I didn't make any resolutions this year, because I never make any resolutions. I guess I figure if something is worth resolving, I'll do it any time of the year; and besides, the only thing New Year's resolutions are known for is their tendency to fall by the wayside around, oh, February. I can review some resolutions already in place, though:

• Love God more every day
• Love my family more, and more selflessly
• Love my friends in a way that is helpful to them and brings glory to God

Everything else pretty much goes under those or doesn't matter.

Ah, they just look so neat and pretty, typed out in a bulleted list, but the actual results so far have been a lot messier. Life is a lot messier than a bulleted list. And I've been pretty beat down lately, for various reasons. Christmas break is always somewhat lonely for me, and this one is particularly hard, with my parents gone on a 2-week cruise (I can't even call them on the phone while they're at sea), and my brother out of town the majority of the time with his fiance, and my boyfriend gone, and one of my best friends having moved away forever last week, and almost everyone else gone for the holidays. (Thank goodness it isn't absolutely everyone. My dear Robin, you have no idea how much I needed you, and how glad I am you're here for me. Thank you.) For a girl whose life resolutions center around love, loneliness is a hard thing to endure.

But that's where the first one comes in. Loving God is what I am designed to do. I've cried a lot in the last few weeks, but I've also learned what it means to have joy in the middle of your tears. Even while I'm feeling down and depressed, I know deep down that everything works out for the good of those who love God, and I know that He will never leave me or forsake me. Even while I'm sad, I feel completely at rest. I am completely confident that it is nothing but a temporary shadow, and I know that God controls everything, even (or especially) my most difficult times. Knowing that there is a perfect plan behind every event, whether happy or sad, keeps me going. I have joy, no matter what is happening externally. And that is an amazing thing.

So, if any of you are having a hard time right now, or if you are having the time of your life, I hope you know the God who gives true joy and contentment in this world.

Happy New Year.