Reasons to Love the Fair

Vegetables.

FFA projects.

Livestock.

Fried Pies! Not to mention fried cheese on a stick, roasted corn, cotton candy, corn dogs, carmel apples, and...

...turkey legs!

And last but not least, my boyfriend's amazing painting. He must have found a really gorgeous model or something.

Senioritis, or Something

I had the craziest thing happen to me today.

Well, it wasn't so much an outward thing that happened, so much as a thought that ran through my head. I was tempted to quit school.

Don't worry, I have absolutely no intention of throwing away all my hard work for the past 3 years. I fully intend to get this degree. But it was just one of those thoughts, that you don't even entertain seriously, but can't help but be attracted to. "I'm not pursuing a career in Classics. I just want to be a writer and have kids or something. I don't need a degree. I could really use more time to research/write the things I've been wanting to write..."

And so on.

Maybe this doesn't seem earth-shattering to most of you (most people I know gripe about school at some point or another), but for me, this is unprecedented.

My life has pretty much revolved around school, for years. It wasn't just a means to an end (I've really never been career-driven), it was an end in itself. I devoted my entire high school career to earning the scholarships I would need to pay for college; and once I got here, school remained the number one priority. I devoted the vast majority of my energies to achieving perfection in every single class; partly because I enjoy learning things (I honestly do), but mostly because I was driven by an unhealthy perfectionism (the 4.0 was an absolute must) and a need for some kind of goal to direct my life.

Last semester I was dead set on going to grad school after I finished my degree, not so much because I need a master's degree, but just because I was terrified of having to deal with a life in which all I had was a pharmacy job or some other repetitive, endless career. Life without school was this terrifying vaccuum.

In recent months, God's really been showing me just how skewed my priorities have been. (That first B I earned last semester, and my completely irrational devastation that resulted, kind of forced me to reevaluate.) I've come to recognize that I've been pretty much insane this whole time. I used to justify it in my mind, and with other people, by saying that my relentless study was the result of a desire to glorify God in what I was doing, and there may have been a grain of truth there, but I was mostly just trying to find fulfillment in school in itself. As nutty as that sounds. (Seriously, I don't expect you guys to identify with this situation. I'm not the only one who thinks I'm crazy.)

So today, when I was tempted to quit school, I was a bit disturbed on one hand, but pretty encouraged on the other. Wanting to be through means that I'm getting over this need for school as some sort of crutch. It means I view other things in my life as more important. Maybe I've turned a corner!

Or maybe I'm just a senior. :)

My Incredibly Complex Personality

I finally got around to taking the Jung typology test, and I'm highly amused/impressed by the accuracy of the results. If you've ever had a hard time figuring me out, read on.

"To outsiders, INTJs may appear to project an aura of "definiteness", of self-confidence. This self-confidence, sometimes mistaken for simple arrogance by the less decisive, is actually of a very specific rather than a general nature; its source lies in the specialized knowledge systems that most INTJs start building at an early age. When it comes to their own areas of expertise -- and INTJs can have several -- they will be able to tell you almost immediately whether or not they can help you, and if so, how. INTJs know what they know, and perhaps still more importantly, they know what they don't know.

INTJs are perfectionists, with a seemingly endless capacity for improving upon anything that takes their interest. What prevents them from becoming chronically bogged down in this pursuit of perfection is the pragmatism so characteristic of the type: INTJs apply (often ruthlessly) the criterion "Does it work?" to everything from their own research efforts to the prevailing social norms. This in turn produces an unusual independence of mind, freeing the INTJ from the constraints of authority, convention, or sentiment for its own sake.

INTJs are idea people. Anything is possible; everything is negotiable. Others may see what is and wonder why; INTJs see what might be and say "Why not?!" They are rather rare, comprising no more than, say, one percent of the population. INTJs can rise to management positions when they are willing to invest time in marketing their abilities as well as enhancing them, and (whether for the sake of ambition or the desire for privacy) many also find it useful to learn to simulate some degree of surface conformism in order to mask their inherent unconventionality.

Personal relationships, particularly romantic ones, can be the INTJ's Achilles heel. While they are capable of caring deeply for others (usually a select few), and are willing to spend a great deal of time and effort on a relationship, the knowledge and self-confidence that make them so successful in other areas can suddenly abandon or mislead them in interpersonal situations.
This happens in part because many INTJs do not readily grasp the social rituals; for instance, they tend to have little patience and less understanding of such things as small talk and flirtation (which most types consider half the fun of a relationship). To complicate matters, INTJs are usually extremely private people, and can often be naturally impassive as well, which makes them easy to misread and misunderstand. Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense. :-) This sometimes results in a peculiar naivete', paralleling that of many Fs -- only instead of expecting inexhaustible affection and empathy from a romantic relationship, the INTJ will expect inexhaustible reasonability and directness."

Are there any other INTJs in the house? ;)

Okay, so maybe I'm opinionated...

This is why I shouldn't read the newspaper.

Column: Poser Christians need to actually represent values
"Drinking, body piercing, tattoos, drug use and premarital sex; what once were cornerstones of vice and sin now seem to be part of the entrance exam into college. ...Even here at Texas Tech, which is located in the second-most conservative city in the United States, these things have become more common in the past couple of years. Perhaps most disturbing, however, is that they have found their way into the activities of what once were God-fearing Christians."

"With every drunken night you can't remember, piercing you add, or person you sleep with, you might as well be handing nails to the Roman soldiers to affix Jesus to the cross."

***

Dear [Columnist],

Hi! My name is [MullTrain], and I'm a senior here at Tech. I read your editorial on Poser Christians today, and since I'm well aware that you'll be getting some hate mail in response, I thought I'd give you some more constructive feedback.

First, I'd like to say that I feel a great concern for this issue, both as a Christian myself and especially, in more recent months, as a leader in one of the university ministries here in town. I've seen this type of behavior among some of our students there, and it bothers me a lot. It's very easy for young Christians to fall into, and it's also a huge turn-off for non-Christians who have contact with those students. So I'm very glad that you have the ability to recognize, and the gumption to write about, this problem.

I would also, however, like to offer a couple of suggestions for any future writing (or speaking, etc.) you might do on this topic. I've found that any time I teach about a moral issue in my Bible study, it always begs the question of "why?" Why should students follow what might seem like arbitrary rules, one might ask, especially if they are aware that they can never be perfect? So it is always very helpful to mention reasons beyond just the outward, "American-society-is-crumbling" type of argument. I agree with you there, but make it more personal and concrete. Remind people that Christianity isn't just about outward action; it's a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Be sure to mention that obedience is a natural outflow of a true Christian's love for God and desire to reflect His perfect nature. This makes a lot more sense than just a call to follow some rules.

And speaking of rules, my only other suggestion is to be very careful that you only condemn behaviors that are clearly spoken against in the Bible. I felt that you damaged your case considerably when you condemned tattoos and body piercings right next to clearly unbiblical behaviors like drunkenness and fornication. The Bible never clearly and unequivocally speaks out against either tattoos or body piercings, although there are certainly verses that tell us not to over-emphasize outer adornment. It's one of those issues that isn't clearly black and white, and as such needs to be handled delicately and with charity toward other Christians who could legitimately disagree with you (Paul addresses this in Romans 14). I am not saying that your viewpoint has no merit; but I would suggest that in a medium such as the newspaper, it is better to stick to clearer issues. The danger here is that someone will read a statement like "With every...piercing you add...you might as well be handing nails to the Roman soldiers..." and (legitimately) disagreeing, say to himself, "Dude, that guy is absolutely insane!" and then completely disregard the overall message, which was very important and very good. So, in other words, don't ruin a good overall message by stirring up needless (and ultimately unresolvable) controversy!

So having said all this, I just wanted to encourage you to keep speaking out on this topic. I commend your sincerity and your zeal for change! Just be sure to use caution and discernment to maximize your effectiveness.Thanks for reading all this!

Sincerely,
[MullTrain]

Fun at Small Group

Tuesday night's small group cluster is so much more than a Bible study. Check it out.

The girls like to do a little modelling...

While the boys do a little cleaning...

And some hardcore rockin' out...

And even a bit of, um, gymnastics...

No one's gotten hurt yet! :)

People Watcher

People are interesting. Do you ever just sit and watch them doing their thing, figuring out things about them just by observing? I think it's a fun pursuit...especially in certain settings, like the Rec Center. I go to the Rec every Monday and Wednesday morning for walking class, and as I spend an hour walking in circles around the indoor track, bored out of my mind, I like to watch everyone else work out. It's really funny, because they all look very serious and absorbed by what they're doing, but they are also all keenly aware of the fact that other people might be watching them. The combination of seriousness for the task, and seriousness for showing off, always provides me with much amusement.

Today before we actually walked, our teacher told us that if we have a tendency to make fists when we walk, we ought to concentrate on relaxing our wrists by touching our thumbs to our middle fingers as we walk (something about lowering blood pressure or some such nonsense). Later, I saw one of my classmates on the track, and she had taken him quite seriously...so much so that she wasn't even swinging her arms or anything, just walking along with her hands sticking out in front with her thumbs and middle fingers together and all the rest of her fingers sticking straight up. It looked really retarded--I had a hard time not laughing out loud as I walked by her.

And now I'm in the library, watching a guy across from me study. He's wearing a shirt that says, "Lefties have rights too!" I like the shirt, but he's writing with his right hand, so I'm confused. Maybe he's just an ally...

Cowboy Symposium

Every year, Lubbock holds a fun little event we like to call the National Cowboy Symposium, a celebration of all things western and cowboy-related. Last night my boyfriend and I made it out there to one of the shows, to see one of our friends who was going to be performing some cowboy poetry. As a *former* English major, I'm well aware that most cowboy poetry has little to offer in terms of artistic merit, but I have a soft spot for it anyway. Andy has a great laid-back style that ends up "sneakin' up on ya" (as one of the cowboys put it last night) and being very funny. Hopefully this afternoon I'll get to take in some more. Last symposium I went to, I remember seeing several cowboy poets and laughing till my sides split. Not a bad way to spend the afternoon, if you ask me.

Besides the poetry last night, there were also several musical acts. Most weren't really exceptional (this is just local folks we're talking about here), but the two acts I liked the most were both accompanied by Washtub Jerry. Haha. The name comes from the fact that he plays a washtub bass. It's a metal washtub turned upside down, with a brake cable attached to the tub on one end and a tall wooden stick on the other. Washtub Jerry stands on the tub and somehow manages to play different notes by just pulling the wood stick closer or pushing it farther away from him as he plucks away. It's a sight to be seen (my camera wasn't working last night, more's the pity). Apparently he's a western music fixture around here--the first act he played with introduced themselves and then said, "Yeah, and y'all all know Washtub Jerry, he's gonna play some bass..." Lol.

Like I said, the music wasn't anything to write home about, but I do also have a bit of a soft spot for western tunes. My parents raised me partially on western music, acts like the Sons of the Pioneers or Riders in the Sky (though I doubt most of you have heard of them), and although I don't really listen to it regularly now, it still has nostalgic appeal for me. "Don't Fence Me In," or "Tumblin' Tumbleweeds"...it's just pretty good stuff.

I can only take these things in fairly small doses, though. Last night I left fairly early after the show because I felt kind of cowboyed out, if you know what I mean. Still, I'm looking forward to going back this afternoon. I may not be a cowgirl or anything, but I see the value in celebrating and preserving our western heritage--if nothing else, it's fun to see all these cowboys' enthusiasm! Hopefully the camera will work today...

Week 2: Creation in Alienation

Here is the manuscript from tonight's Bible study lesson, just in case anyone is interested to see what we're studying. Since I bother to write the thing, for my own benefit, I might as well post it, I guess. Keep in mind that this is just my notes, and that the study is discussion oriented, so this isn't some kind of serious treatise or anything.

Genesis 11:1-9 The Tower of Babel

Last week, we talked about the creation of the world, and this picture in Genesis 1-2 of man in perfect fellowship with God and each other. We discussed our created purpose as creatures who are designed to be in fellowship with God, and thought about ways that this perspective could help change the way we view our nonbelieving friends and family—that is, to help us view them as people who are missing out on the only thing that can fulfill them and give them purpose, both in this life and in eternity.

Sunday, Dusty talked about the isolation effect of sin upon mankind. As a result of Adam and Eve’s sin, a fracture was created, both in man’s fellowship with God and in relationships between humans. It is in this broken world that we live today. God responded to this fracture by promising a great plan of restoration and redemption that will someday restore humanity back to its original and perfect state of union, both with God and with each other. This great promise has already seen fulfillment in the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, and at Jesus’ second return will come to full fruition in the new Heaven and the new Earth. Dusty also pointed out that, unless we feel the sting of our treason against the Creator, we cannot understand or receive the grace and restoration that is offered. Our sin is real, and we must take responsibility for it.

This week, we will be looking at another passage illustrating sin and its ability to separate men from God and each other. Read Genesis 11:1-9, the story of the Tower of Babel. This story is one of my favorite Old Testament passages, mostly because of my interest in ancient languages and cultures. It’s easy for me to focus on the “facts” of this passage as a battle against modern anthropological models of language dispersion and so on. Just as it’s dangerous to view creation only through the lens of combating Darwinism, it’s also not a good idea to view this story in such a limited way. Let’s think about what this story would have meant to the Israelites at the time it was written. The Israelites would have approached this passage as a.) an explanation of how mankind got from Adam to their present, that is, their connection to the past, b.) an explanation of who all the other nations on the earth were and where they came from, and c.) an example of what happens as a result of a people’s unified rebellion against God. Since we skipped some chapters in between, let’s situate the passage in its context within the book. This story occurs after the great Flood. God, in judgment against the growth of mankind’s sin, wiped out all the earth except for Noah and his family. Thus, all these people are Noah’s descendants, and in chapter 9, verse 1, God charged them to multiply and “fill the earth.” This story apparently happens several generations later, when they’ve multiplied quite a bit but apparently haven’t spread out much.

Obviously, God was not pleased with the people’s choice to build a tower. But why was building the tower a sin? Was it the tower itself, or what? Well, first of all, let’s make sure we know what sin is. What does sin mean, exactly? Is it an action? Does it simply mean “doing bad things”? Sin is, quite simply, any attitude or action that goes against God’s will or His nature. Paul says in Romans 14:23 that “whatever does not proceed from faith is sin;” in other words, doing things that are not motivated by a desire to glorify God is sin. Augustine wrote in the 3rd century AD that he saw sin, or evil, not as a thing in itself, but as the absence of God’s goodness. So as you can see, sin is not merely confined to individual acts; it is a way of thinking that leads to acts that go against God’s stated will. So how does this definition of sin affect the way we view or deal with sin in our own lives? In the lives of those around us? Does it change the way we approach evangelism?

So now that we’ve defined sin, let’s look at why the building of the Tower of Babel was a sin. Buildings aren’t sinful objects in and of themselves; but motivation is everything. (I think it’s important to interject here that they were not trying to literally build a tower that reached heaven, despite the fact that we often hear that in Sunday School. They were, however, trying to accomplish something great.) What were the people motivated by? They state a desire to make a name for themselves, and a fear of being dispersed in the whole earth. These motivations are actually very natural to humans: they wanted to establish an identity for themselves, and they wanted a sense of community and civilization as protection against loneliness. Although these desires are not necessarily wrong, the people at Babel are going about it all wrong—they’re in unified rebellion against God. Instead of finding their identity in God, they seek to set up their own name, and establish their own importance. And instead of spreading out in the earth like God commanded them to, and trusting Him to meet their needs, they are refusing point-blank to do as they were told. Just like Adam and Eve in the garden, they’re convinced that God is holding out on them, and they are therefore making much of themselves, and trying to make their own way, instead of worshiping the God of creation.

So how does God respond to this rebellion? Do you think He felt threatened by the power of this civilization? Verse six sort of makes it sound that way, but we know that the Creator of the universe is not threatened by anything we humans can do. Why then did God decide to stop the construction of the tower and confuse the languages? Was He just “playing the language card” since He had already used up the whole flood idea (and had promised never to do that again)? God knew that such a work was only the beginning of what a unified, rebellious culture would seek to do. A humanity that believed nothing was impossible for them would be motivated to explore all kinds of new ways to glorify themselves. God knew the totalitarian evil that would result in such a situation. He knew that the people of Babel would eventually self destruct! Therefore his decision to stop the construction of the tower was an act of mercy. By making His name great again in the minds of the people, he prevented them from killing themselves in an evil civilization. Have you ever experienced God’s discipline in your life? Has He ever had to do something drastic to get your attention and divert you from a destructive path?

It’s important to realize that God’s creation of the different languages and cultures was not an afterthought or something He came up with off the cuff. The theme of God’s heart for the nations is a major one that we see throughout the entire Bible, starting here. God had a plan for nations from the beginning, and the diversity of mankind, along with its eventual reunion at Jesus’ second coming (Rev. 7:9-10), brings great glory to God and is an essential part of His plan of redemption, in which He used one nation as a means of blessing the others (we’ll see this idea coming up next week, when we talk about Abraham and Jacob).

So how does this concept of “the nations” affect our lives as Christians today? It’s a huge part of our calling as New Testament believers! Let’s look at Matthew 28:18-20. Does this Great Commission affect the way we live, on our campus and in our world? God has a heart for the nations, and so should we!

Rain is Good for the Brain

What a lovely afternoon. Although I had to sacrifice seeing my friend the Sun, I have enjoyed this cloudy, dreary, rainy day. Sometimes I feel like I think better on cloudy days. My boyfriend and I were just discussing it, and I think there's something intellectually stimulating about rain. It's the sort of thing that either drives me to curl up on the couch with a book and a cup of coffee (mmm...), or the type of environment that becomes conducive to metaphysical speculations. I'm feeling both of these little tugs at the moment, but since I have to go to a leader's meeting in about half an hour, I decided to write instead. Writing seems to fall under the rain-stimulated category as well. If I ever become I writer, I ought to move to England, so that I could be stimulated 'most every day.

If I ever become a writer...you know, I think someday I'm going to do that. Writing is another one of those unexplained impulses I've always had--just like traveling and teaching--that I've always been kind of afraid to pursue. After all, it takes a bit of gumption to write...and it's a pretty lonely pursuit, since no one else can really participate in the actual process. But I am pretty sure that I can do it, and that I ought to try my hand at it. I didn't think I had the ability to teach or the gumption to travel, but in recent times I've proved myself wrong on both counts. Both of those pursuits have proven rewarding in many different ways. Writing will be my next thing to conquer, I've decided.

This doesn't, of course, mean that I have any clear ideas of what I want to write, or to what end. All I have right now is this vague desire to write as some sort of creative outlet. Not that I'm very creative or anything (if I were, coming up with something to write wouldn't be the problem). It also doesn't mean that I'm planning on doing anything too concrete in that direction right now. I have to finish school first, and at present school, work, and teaching occupy all the time that I'm willing to give to "working" activities. After I graduate in May, though, I think I'll be getting a lot more serious about starting a project. Maybe by then I'll know what I want to do. Fiction or nonfiction? Something historical? Some sort of fantasy/myth? Surely my knowledge and interests can combine somehow to produce something worthwhile. I just don't know how.

Anyways, maybe someday I'll be hit with a lightning bolt of inspiration. In the meantime, I'll just blog.

I think I ought to warn y'all in advance that this blog just might become an outlet for my thoughts in preparation for Bible study. Heck, I might even write out some sort of loose approximation of what I want to cover in that week's session, as a way of organizing my thoughts. Writing it out in conversational paragraph form tends to help me to do that, even better than outlining. Anyway, if a lot of these posts turn into loosely organized rants on Old Testament passages, you can't say I didn't warn you. You don't have to pretend to be interested or anything. :)

Our leader meeting this afternoon could be a sleepy affair, with all the rain (since it seems that most people's tendencies on cloudy days are opposite of mine; I may be the only one who feels intellectually brighter on these days). I am going to try to liven up the discussion as much as possible, but I find that hard to do, usually. It may sound odd, but I have a hard time talking in group discussions, even though I have very little problem leading them. I suppose I am not confident enough when I don't feel like I'm supposed to be talking a lot. Or something. Who knows. But this meeting, we're discussing teaching approaches to the Tower of Babel, which is one of my favorite passages in the Old Testament. (It may sound like an odd passage to be one's favorite, but keep in mind that I have an abiding interest in ancient languages and cultures. This is where they all got started!) We're also discussing sin, how to define it, how to approach it, etc. Should be good stuff. I'm ready to jump in (see above: rain as stimulation for metaphysical speculation).

So I guess I'd better start heading that direction. More posts to follow this week...I'm not planning on being MIA all semester!

A Thoughtful Week

I have been remiss, I believe, in not posting this week, since so much has happened. But right now I don't have the time, so in lieu of a real post, here's a little list of what's been going through my head:

a.) Walking class at 8 am is not the evil one might imagine it to be, but it is rather boring.
b.) Birthdays rock. I now own every appliance I need, and then some.
c.) I like to teach the Bible.
d.) Retaking Greek might be a good idea in the long run, but class-long discussions on the alphabet are enough to make me crazy.
e.) Why does sin exist? What is sin? Did Adam and Eve have sinful natures?
f.) Bipolar disease-I went to a conference on it, and actually found something besides the free food worth paying attention to (those pharmacy meetings tend to be rather laborious).

Yeah, so that's some of what's been running around my brain lately. Maybe some of these will be fleshed out into real posts someday. Oh, and here's another one:
g.) I like my boyfriend.

We're going out to dinner tonight. :) Happy birthday to me...still...